Play for me
by Anom
Summary: Spiral, Suiri no kizuna - set before the series, a short story focusing mainly on Kanone, Eyes, and their relationship. shounen-ai warning for later chapters(obviously)
1. Piano

Please note that this is a shounen-ai fiction(boyxboy) about Kanone and Eyes. If this offends you for some reason, don't read it, if you do read it and it offends you, you were warned so you can't bitch about it.

Of course, people will probably be squealing with happiness just because its Kanone/Eyes, so I don't think I need the warning.

Ney, a few points to set this up. I'm putting this before Kiyotaka shows up(cause then the Eyes/Kanone thing starts having problems I think). The Blade Children are currently living in what used to be Kanone's families house, unfortunately(as the parents of Blade Children ave a tendency to do) Kanone's parents are dead so it's basically his house.

  
  


***

  
  


Kousuke jumped back as the door he expected to be held open slammed shut, nearly hitting his face. Irritated, he yelled inside,

"Hey, Rio!"

The short, grey-haired girl peeked through the screen at him innocently, as if she had no idea how he had ended up with his arms full of groceries and a closed door in front of him.

"What?"

"You wanna open the door?"

She folded her arms behind her back, a sickeningly cute smile on her bright face,

"Not really."

He sighed, this was exactly why he hadn't wanted to go food shopping with Rio. He knew the fact that the trip had gone without incident had been too good to be true. Grumbling about inconvenience, Kousuke set the bags down and reached for the door nob. It refused to turn, and Rio's snickered at his predicament.

The redhead leaned against the doorframe and checked his pockets; Yup, his keys were missing.

"If I have to break this door, Kanone is going to be VERY mad at you."

Rio stuck her tongue out, exhibiting Kousuke's keys and lockpick proudly in one hand,

"Baka, he'd be mad at you, not me."

Kousuke mulled over his options. He wasn't in the mood to find another way in, which probably would have been dangerous anyway(it was Kanone's house after all, who knew how the security system worked), and he wasn't in favor of breaking the screen either.

A flash of green from the brown paper bags caught his eye, and a brilliantly simple idea sprang to mind. Pulling a melon from the bag, Kousuke held it in from of the door, studying it,

"So, how mad would you be if this ended up all over the cement?"

Rio actually went pale as she contemplated the melons horrible fate,

"You wouldn't!"

Smirking, Kousuke dropped the melon, only to catch it after it had fallen about a foot, laughing the whole time as Rio yelped. The melon still in hand, he glanced expectantly at Rio. Scowling, she opened the door, snatching the melon from him and holding it protectively.

Picking up the groceries, Kousuke savored victory on his way to the kitchen. Rio followed him and, after stowing her precious melon away safely, perched on a counter to watch him put away the food.

"It's your turn to cook tonight."

"No, it isn't, I cooked last night."

Rio stuck her lip out stubbornly,

"As punishment for endangering the treat Eyes-kun gave me money for, you should have to make dinner. "

"Brat."

With an indignant noise, Rio quickly plotted revenge in the form a projectile object,.

  
  
  
  


*thok*

"More from your wrist."

*thok*

"Much better, Eyes."

Kanone leisurely leaned against a tree, watching his closest friend practicing with the sleek black throwing knives. He hadn't been lying, Eyes had been steadily improving, maybe soon they'd be equals. The younger, silver-haired Blade Child tensed, readying to throw one of his two remaining knives. Kanone observed, admiring the serious intensity with which Eye's approached this and all other aspects of their training. If only the others took it as seriously, Kanone thought.

Then again, He conceded, watching the knife bury itself to the hilt in the target, maybe he was just a little biased. With the same quiet admiration he watched the final throw, more interested in how the slender muscles in Eyes' shoulders were perfectly visible under the skintight black shirt he was wearing.

Eyes murmured something that sounded disappointed under his breath. Kanone abruptly came out of his reverie,

"....what?"

Eyes regarded him calmly, gesturing slightly towards the target,

"I missed the last one."

Kanone came to stand next to him, looking down the short field,

"So you did." He smiled, patting him on the back, "No problem."

"In a life or death situation, it would be unacceptable." He studied the target, "I could be dead."

"Hmm..." Kanone went to retrieve the knives, leaving Eyes at the other end of the field. Kneeling, he picked up the one that had missed its intended destination. Standing, he paused to look the weapon over, the killer that rested within every Blade Child surfacing. Carefully he tested the fine edge with his thumb. This, like all his knives, like himself, was a perfectly honed weapon. An eery smile beginning, he caught sight of Eyes on the corner of his vision.

Quite suddenly, he felt the urge to throw the knife at his friend. He certainly could, it would be an easy throw, Eyes was unsuspecting...

Shaking his head in alarm, Kanone banished the urge. Quickly he finished gathering the throwing knives, pushing the disturbing incident to the back of his mind. He rejoined Eyes, forcing an easy smile to his lips.

Eyes, who knew Kanone better than anyone, felt the faintest uneasiness in his friends bearing. His eyes, an eery shade of brilliant blue, locked with Kanone's bright olive eyes, searching for the source of the emotion.

A sudden commotion from the house commanded their attention as Kousuke's indignant yell erupted from the kitchen, preceded and followed by several crashes.

Kanone swore under his breath and ran to save his kitchen, Eyes following not far behind at a more restrained pace.

  
  
  
  
  
  


"BAKA!"

"I definitely didn't deserve that!"

"What is wrong with you two?!"

Rio froze to look over at a very displeased Kanone. Asazuki took the chance to snatch his glasses back from her. Replacing them on his nose, he turned to Kanone as well, offering an explanation first,

"It was all Rio's fault."

"Hey!"

Having expected this sort of reaction, Kanone wasn't really listening. Rather, he was looking around the room. As was the normal outcome of Rio and Kousuke's frequent fights, the room was, for lack of a better word; trashed. Kanone was just glad Ryoko hadn't been involved this time.

Not even bothering to berate them, Kanone turned to leave, trusting the two to take the hint and clean up. As he stalked down the hall, tossing the knives he was carrying onto a table, the sound of a piano being played from another room reached his ears. The soothing, beautiful music calmed Kanone instantly. He sighed happily, the anger from a few seconds before slipping from his mind. 

Eyes had been gone for a few weeks, only returning the day before. Even as young as he was, his fame was well known on several continents. Despite the obvious risks involved in traveling away from his fellow Blade Children, Eyes would never have even considered refusing returning to England to perform. 

Kanone had dearly missed his music.

He entered the room quietly, letting the haunting music wash over him. Eyes, though obviously fully aware of his presence, did not acknowledge it. Pausing only to jot down a few bars of the new melody, the silver haired Blade Child concentrated only on his piano, as if his entire world consisted of the black and white keys. Kanone ventured to lean on the edge of the instrument, closing his eyes to fully take in the music.

Kanone could never fully understand Eyes' unnatural talent, although he certainly admired it. He could not fathom where the entrancing music was born from, or how Eyes could so skillfully translate whatever he drew inspiration from onto the keys before him. So he was content to merely listen, hoping maybe to catch a glimpse into the meaning of each new measure.

Gradually the intensity of the piece died down, and Eyes paused his playing. Picking up a pen, he scribbled down the notes onto the blank paper in front of him. Kanone lazily opened his eyes,

"When did you come up with that one?"

"...just now..." Eyes replied softly, off-hand, fully engrossed in capturing the melody onto paper. He stopped for a moment, testing a few keys expertly before returning to the sheet music with the right notes.

"It was good." Kanone remarked, laughing inwardly at the sheer inadequacy of the word. Eyes raised an eyebrow, glancing quickly at the older teen,

"I rather thought so myself."

Kanone leaned forward, laying his torso on the piano so he and Eyes were almost face to face. Or, rather, they would have been if Eyes was looking.

"Will you play for me, Eyes?"

This time Eyes didn't bother looking up,

"Wasn't I?"

Kanone laughed softly,

"No, you played while I was in the room. I'm asking if you'll play for me."

Eyes shrugged, a barely noticeable movement of his shoulders,

"Give me a minute."

Eyes scribbled down the last part of the new song, then carefully placed the new sheets of music into a folder. He paused, hands poised over the keys, and looked up at Kanone,

"Anything in particular you want to hear?"

Kanone shook his head, leaning on his palm,

"Just play for me."

Eyes mulled over several songs in his mind, feeling them out. Play for Kanone? He wasn't sure if he knew anything that would fit his best friend. He glanced up, looking into Kanone's olive green eyes, searching for something to inspire his music. If the eyes were a window to ones soul, then Kanone's was jealously guarded, Eyes could read nothing from him, only seeing a faint allusion to a haunting depth and wary soul. 

With a vague smile, Eyes let his fingers glide over the piano keys.

Kanone was startled as Eyes abruptly began an almost eery song. It started quietly, building layer upon layer of perfect music that left Kanone absolutely dumbfounded. Rutherford was playing with his eyes closed, letting his intuition and expertise guide his fingers where he wanted them. The music seemed to burrow into Kanone's heart, mirroring his carefully hidden self.

Eyes played almost feverishly, now oblivious to the world outside of the room. Kanone watched, hoping to memorizing the passion he could see on Eyes normally expressionless face. Never before had he seen Eyes even look interested in what he was playing, rather, he had always seemed coldly indifferent and almost bored with his own music. 

This time it was different. Kanone was reaching out to touch Eyes' face almost before he realized what he was doing, the moment had entranced him so. Gingerly, he pulled his hand away, not wanting to interrupt. The music continued for some time, until gradually winding down and finally stopping. Kanone imagined he could feel it still in his chest, and Eyes sat silently staring at nothing.

"....do you ever read what your fans write about how you play, Eyes?" Kanone grudgingly broke the silence. Eyes shook his head, as reluctant as Kanone to speak,

"There's nothing my intelligent fans can tell me that I do not already know, and young women's admiration does get old fast..."

Kanone sat on the piano, leaning back on his arms.

"Some of them say you play as if you have no soul, and your music sounds perfect...yet empty..."

"Do you think so?"

Kanone graced him with a small, sincere smile,

"Not anymore."

  
  


***

  
  


What do ya think? It's still kind of a first draft, I might re upload it if I rewrite some. It'll go on from here, probably getting a PG/PG-13 rating later.


	2. Frustration

Review answers come first...*ahem*

  
  


Stardustangel1 - Yes, they are both VERY stubborn. Truthfully, I see it as Kanone knows he loves Eyes, but Eyes doesn't quite realize it at first. Hence, Kanone is the aggressor in their relationship(AKA; seme, Eyes just smacks of uke).

Heh, don't worry, they will 'get together' later, much later most likely(as I said, PG/PG13). No broom closets involved, as interesting as that would be.

  
  


Ichibyo - There's NO WAY I would leave out Ryoko, I love Ryoko. She just takes her time showing up...like, right after this intro...

  
  


Uzumaki-sama - You really think I write Kanone well? I've actually been agonizing over how he feels about the other Blade Children for a while now. I think I'll have a separate epilogue thing just to talk about that. Creepy little bugger.

  
  


Chikage Stollen - *Squealing glee* I've read pretty much all of your Spiral fics, they're all so good! 

Erm, yeah, I always did have issues with grammar...

  
  


Thanks to everyone for their lovely reviews! I was so nervous when I started this fic, I don't usually write romance, and I'm not fond of shounen-ai, but Kanone and Eyes were just begging for it and I couldn't resist.

  
  


*****

Ryoko paused at the door, wiping sweat off her forehead and picking leaves from her hair. She loved the transition from summer to fall. The brisk, chill weather was so fun to run in, it made her feel so alive. She stood outside a few moments longer, enjoying the peacefulness. As soon as she stepped inside, she would be reminded of her curse, her fate that she shared with the others. Out here she could be Ryoko, she could pretend that she wasn't missing a rib, a family, and a normal life.

But this was one thing she couldn't run away from. Running her hands through now messy hair, Ryoko walked inside, feeling the warmth of indoors seeping into her skin. She breathed in happily, maybe she was being a little over dramatic.

Navigating the messy kitchen, she casually greeted Kousuke and Rio, who were sulkily cleaning, and took a bottle of water from the fridge. Taking a deep drink, she leaned back against the counter.

"So, who started this one?"

Rio paused from where she was picking up fruit off the floor,

"I was provoked."

"Of course. Kousuke, how could you?"

Kousuke denied the accusation vehemently, completely missing the humor in Ryoko's voice. She laughed softly and knelt to help them finish putting away the groceries.

Rio, seeing the older Blade Children distracted, took the chance to sneak out of the kitchen. A few seconds later, Kousuke noticed her absence,

"Where'd Ri....Hey!"

"Oh, leave it. The kitchen's almost clean anyway."

Kousuke didn't argue, the room was almost clean, but this was a matter or principle! Of course, he himself had few principles, he supposed. He figured he could let Rio go this time, proving, as Ryoko had often said, that he was 'a fluffball' at heart.

"How was your run?"

Ryoko brightened up, saying enthusiastically,

"Wonderful! There's nothing better than fall. Kousuke, you should come with me some time."

He snorted,

"Oh yeah, I really want to spend an afternoon eating your dust."

"That's not fair; you know I'd slow down for you."

"I don't like running..."

Ryoko scowled and put her hands to her hips,

"Stop being stubborn, you know you'll end up coming if I ask you to."

Kousuke chuckled, picking up the last of the mess.

"What do I get out of it?"

Ryoko pouted in an expression of mock hurt,

"You get to enjoy my company, isn't that enough?"

Without waiting for an answer, she got up to leave, stating,

"I'm better change out of these clothes, they're all sweaty."

Kousuke asked impishly, unable to resist,

"Can I come along for that?"

Ryoko playfully threw a washcloth at him, which he caught deftly in one hand,

He called down the hall after her retreating figure.

"So, is that a maybe?" 

  
  


Eyes rolled the pen he was holding around and between his fingers, flipping it casually in a fluid motion, it was a display of skill that many would have envied. But Eyes was hardly aware he was doing it, and Kanone, lying down on the piano, wasn't really paying attention to the pen. Eyes stared at the paper in front of him. Its once clean measures had been filled with notes, crossed out, tried again, and rejected once more. Eyes futilely tried again to put the heartfelt music from minutes before onto paper.

Suddenly the pen stopped its motion. Eyes flicked it angrily to the floor in a rare display of frustration, shoving the papers unceremoniously aside. Kanone turned to him in concern, Eyes leaned on the piano,

"What I just played, it doesn't seem right on paper, I can't recreate it."

His friend shrugged, 

"Maybe it was only meant for me." He chided, nudging Eyes, "I'll certainly never forget it." Or, more importantly, he'd never forget what he'd seen on Eyes' face while he played.

Eyes looked up, a strange look on his face.

"It was only music . . . " He said quietly, stiffly. Without another word, he pushed the bench away from the piano and left the room, leaving Kanone alone and confused. Had he said something wrong?

  
  


Eyes walked up the stairs slowly, revealing none of the turmoil he was feeling. He wasn't sure what had happened when he had played for Kanone. Playing the piano, for Eyes, was an emotionless thing, that was the point of it. Since he had been young, he felt nothing when he played, only the cold calculations involved in remembering the keys and reading the notes in front of him. The music he had played for his friend had been different, it had come from somewhere else that he had never tapped into before. The way he played mirrored the way he was, and when that reflection was not what he expected for those few minutes with Kanone, it had unnerved him.

And that wasn't something Eyes Rutherford was very used to.

He didn't like it.

Kanone sat on the piano bench, frustrated. He didn't know what had just happened, he couldn't fathom what had put Eyes off so quickly. Surely he had only been complementary, and even if he hadn't, Eyes wasn't the type to get angry over small, unintended insults.

He wondered, perhaps, if Eyes had noticed the subtle changes in their friendship, and that had put him on guard. Kanone exhaled slowly, worried. He would rather bury his yearning and deny it than lose what he already had with Eyes. But . . . but it was hard when he lately found he desperately wanted something more than friendship. He clenched his hands, wishing things could go easily only for this one thing. But such was the destiny of the Blade Children, he conceded, that no level of comfort or happiness should come easily to them, if at all.

This, and only this situation made Kanone angry at destiny. He quelled the emotion as quickly as it was shown. Destiny could not be denied, not even for this.

Thoughts' sill muddled and feelings still warring within, Kanone slunk out of the room hoping to find a distraction.

  
  


The pain came upon her suddenly. A sharp, stabbing pain where her missing rib should have been. Grunting in agony, Ryoko slumped against the wall and clenched her teeth. She prayed Kousuke wouldn't find her like this, it would worry him and there was nothing he could do. Stubbornly, she bore out the pain, waited until it vanished as mysteriously as it had come. The lingering sensation left behind, not unlike a sleeping limb's prickling, was bearable. Panting in pain, Ryoko wiped away a thin film of sweat on her face and stood to find herself face to face with Kanone.

Startled, Ryoko said nothing. Kanone leaned against the wall in the dark hall, and his eyes seemed to bore into hers intensely.

"Does it hurt, Ryoko?"

She breathed in deep to steady her voice,

"Yeah, sometimes."

Kanone looked away distractedly, murmuring softly,

"It seems our destiny that we all must suffer somehow . . . doesn't it?"

Ryoko didn't answer, but followed his gaze to the empty piano. Still trying to banish the left over ache, Ryoko didn't put too much thought into whatever Kanone was referring to. He was always talking about 'destiny', 'fate' and things like that; she wasn't in the mood for it right now.

Still clutching her side, she muttered,

"I'm going to go lie down."

  
  


As Ryoko disappeared down the hall, Kanone turned away, not giving the girl another thought. He headed down toward the kitchen, his footsteps silent as always. In the kitchen, Kousuke was standing facing away from Kanone. A sudden, malicious, smirk on his face, Kanone swiftly advanced, his approached even more chillingly silent than before.

  
  


A split second before Kanone grabbed the red-head, Kousuke tried to turn and retaliate. It didn't go over well, and all Kousuke got for his efforts was an aching wrist as Kanone locked his arm behind his back.

"Still too slow, Kousuke."

Kousuke grunted,

"I almost got you that time."

Kanone felt the same want to kill in the back of his mind rising once again. He knew from experience that snapping someone's neck wasn't as hard as it seemed . . . The urge wasn't as strong as it had been concerning Eyes, though. Pity. He subdued it easily.

"Almost doesn't count when you're dead." Kanone reminded him, letting go. Kousuke rubbed his wrist, asking sourly,

"I'm getting better, though, isn't that the point?"

Kanone, despite his current mood, softened a bit,

"I suppose." He didn't add, though, that Eyes had barely needed the random tests to hone his reflexes.

Rio ran into the room, skidding to a halt when she saw Kanone and blatantly ignoring the dirty look Kousuke threw her way.

"Ah! Kanone-kun, can I practice with your knives?"

Seeing a diversion for his troubled mind, Kanone almost eagerly agreed to teach her new throwing techniques and, on her insistence, promised to show her the trick where he pinned falling leaves to the target. 

  
  


Eyes sat in his sparsely furnished room, leaning on the windowsill. The chill breeze of evening played with his hair and ran over his skin soothingly. For the past few minutes he had managed to keep his mind blank and himself perfectly calm; serene even. From his window he could see the forms of Rio and Kanone in the field below his window and impassively he watched the throwing lesson. Kanone was teaching the girl many of the same things he had been going over with Eyes that same afternoon, but Eyes couldn't help but notice small differences in the way he taught. 

Eyes watched Kanone hold Rio's wrist, showing her a better way to hold the knife. He could easily recall the guidance Kanone had given him, the way certain touches had lingered for longer than necessary and others abruptly cut off as though Kanone were nervous of something. He had noticed small things like that more often recently, actually. 

Of the two, Eyes was certainly the quieter. But Kanone had always been there to fill the empty conversation, he always had something to say to his silent comrade. Eyes barely realized it, but he was almost proud of the fact the Kanone was so warm and relaxed when it was just the two of them, that he was the only person Kanone put any real trust in. Lately, however, the conversations had been halting. Kanone was at loss for what to say more often, what he did say seemed more guarded, more insecure. It was almost as if he was shy or worried about something. With a small shock, Eyes realized that he was angry Kanone wouldn't tell him what was wrong.

Even stranger to Eyes were Kanone's occasional temperamental moments. He had never known his always calm and smiling friend to be irritable, but it had been getting worse recently. Were Eyes someone with a more juvenile sense of humor, he might have said Kanone was PMSing. The new stress in their friendship had Eyes worried as of late, and for the first time the ice-eyed Blade Child knew fear. He missed the perfect, easy bond they had shared, and refused to think of what life would be like without it.

With some effort, Eyes looked away from the field. He couldn't figure out what was going on at the moment, so he chose to believe that Kanone would eventually tell him what was wrong. With that settled, Eyes resumed reading through a book he had left on his desk, an ancient, horridly boring text of some kind that he was forcing himself to read for the sake of reading. Within moments, the mind dulling lines had pushed away any and all worry from the boys mind.

  
  


Kousuke rolled his eyes as he flipped through channels; there was never anything good on. And he was really bored. He hadn't seen Ryoko since that afternoon, Eyes was being reclusive, and Kanone and Rio were throwing knives around outside. So he was stuck without anything to do. 

Sighing in disgusted at another commercial he flipped past a random sitcom, the sort of show that would make him feel physically ill to watch. Kousuke was the kind of person who thrived when other people were around, by himself like this he wasn't sure what to do. He switched to a promising channel, one that usually had violent movies playing, and was instead treated to a behind the scenes look at a movie he already hated. Scowling, Kousuke admitted defeat and turned off the tv.

Closing his eyes, he leaned back against the cushions, fully intending to nap until dinner or at least until someone came back inside.

As he lay there, something sounded a warning in the back of his mind. Confused, Kousuke was about to react when someone jumped on top of him.

"Holy fu...!"

Rio smiled at him, that perky, innocent smile that completely fooled those who didn't know any better. She must have jumped pretty hard, or maybe it was just the fact that she had leapt right onto his unsuspecting lap that had really hurt.

"Are you making dinner anytime soon, Kousuke-kun?"

Kousuke shoved her unceremoniously off his lap, Rio landed hard on her backside, the very picture of injured dignity. Content with that small victory, Kousuke figured it wouldn't be such a hardship to make a meal. It didn't look like anyone else would be doing it anytime soon, and it was getting late.

Rio, as was her nature, followed him to make sure he did what she wanted. She watched Kousuke getting out a frying pan and digging through the fridge, asking, 

"What are you making?"

"Scrambled eggs."

"For dinner?"

Kousuke pulled a carton of eggs from the fridge,

"Yup."

Rio wrinkled her nose in distaste,

"Is that all you can make?"

Kousuke's tone was snide,

"You were the one who wanted me to cook. Don't worry, I'll make yours special."

Rio cocked her head, wary but curious,

"What do you mean?"

An evil smirk on his face, Kousuke called into the next room,

"Hey Kanone! Where do you keep the rat poison?"

As Rio fumed, Kanone answered blandly,

"Second shelf down under the oven. Don't use it all this time."

Kousuke turned to grin at the short girl, and Rio crossed her arms and turned away from him in a manner that said very clearly she was 'above' his petty jibes.

"Hmpf, fine then, I'll make my own meal."

That received a laugh,

"All you can make is sandwiches!"

Rio clenched her fist and yelled back at him,

"That's better than burnt eggs!"

"Hey! Don't dishonor my eggs!"

  
  


In the next room, Kanone was quite clearly hearing the entire argument escalate, and he was not looking forward to putting down his book and playing mediator again. He was getting rather sick of it in fact.

Fortunately for him, the argument and the yelling died down, and not too long later Rio had her sandwich and there was some sort of meal for anyone who felt like wandering in to eat. Kanone didn't feel like having dinner for some reason. Not that anyone would notice, they weren't exactly the kind of group to sit down together for every meal. Most of them, at least.

Not long later, Kousuke wandered into the living room, pausing to lean on the back of the couch near Kanone.

"Do you know where Ryoko is?"

Kanone sighed in slight exasperation (an emotion he almost exclusively associated with Kousuke and Ryoko), closing his eyes and not looking at the red head,

"What makes you think I would know?"

A bit taken aback by the tone, Kousuke muttered defensively,

"Nothing . . . I just...well, she only went upstairs to change..."

Returning to the novel, Kanone remembered seeing Ryoko collapse in the hallway. Idly, he mulled over telling Kousuke just to watch him freak out. Those two were so protective it was almost funny how they had fooled themselves into thinking they didn't really like each other. Honestly, they should have gotten over those games by now. In the end, though, he vouched for keeping the evening quiet.

Kousuke, worried despite himself, started on his way upstairs to check on Ryoko. Eyes came down the staircase quietly, apparently lost in his own world. As he passed the red-head he said simply, 

"She's sleeping, don't bother."

*****

  
  


You guys have no idea how much trouble this chapter gave me . . . I had the scenes figured out, but getting them to fit together and flow was awful.That and I completely cut it off at the end because I felt guilty about not updating for so long.

  
  


And then my computer decided to get a really nasty virus so I wasn't able to touch it at all for over a week...people suck...

  
  


*****

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  



	3. Break: Musings and other stuff

  
  


Kanone and how I think through his relationships with the other Blade Children:

Kousuke - I get the feeling that Kanone looks down on Kousuke. It was apparent in the show that Kousuke wasn't the brightest of the Blade Children, and he has problems controlling his temper. Kanone would see both those traits as liability, and, considering Kanone generally has complete control of his own emotions, he also thinks of Kousuke as slightly childish. It's very obvious that Ryoko has more influence on Kousuke than Kanone ever will. This being so, Ryoko refuses to kill and would want Kousuke to do the same. Kanone would be disgusted by the blatant refusal to accept destiny and probably be angry. As it was, Kousuke was a murderer, so Kanone sees him as useful sometimes, but he wouldn't put any great trust in Kousuke's abilities.

  
  


Ryoko - Kanone does not like Ryoko. She dares to believe that she can break free of the curse, and openly defies destiny by refusing to kill even in self defense. Kanone may feel slightly threatened by her strength of will, if she does succeed in what she hopes to, he would be proven wrong, and everything he believes in would be torn down, he will have nothing. Kanone believes this will never happen, so Ryoko is a nuisance, a bad influence on the other Blade Children. She also has influence over Kousuke and Rio as their friend, which would challenge Kanone's leadership and teachings. I'm sure he wasn't sorry to see her leave.

  
  


Rio - Rio has enormous potential in Kanone's eyes. She is ruthless when pursuing a kill, highly skilled, very intelligent and devious, and not beneath using her outward appearance to fool others. Her true loyalty lies with Eyes though, but at the point I wrote this story in it wouldn't matter because Eyes still looks up to Kanone. Later this will prove a problem, when Eyes chooses to believe Kiyotaka's promises of salvation Rio will follow, and Kanone will see her gradually rethink her beliefs on killing, eventually she would fall out of his favor. Then she, like all the others, would have to be shown what happens to those who dare oppose destiny.

  
  


Eyes - Yes, Kanone is madly in love with Eyes, one might say possessive as well. Eyes is the only thing Kanone is truly loves, and the only thing he is scared of losing. He would almost defy the destiny he preaches for Eyes, but in the end he won't, and he does lose him. Ultimately, I think it's Kiyotaka who ends their relationship. Eyes wants to believe what Kiyotaka is saying, and Kanone would probably feel more comfortable if Kiyotaka was dead(I half expected Kanone to tell Ayumu he killed Kiyotaka at some point in the show). Kanone would be jealous that Eyes believed so much in what Kiyotaka was saying, almost feel betrayed.

  
  


The missing rib

I don't have any explanation as to why they are all missing a rib, but I decided to make a few guesses as to what the pain Eyes felt there in the show was all about.

My theory(in this story at least, I might change it later) is that the pain is a reminder of their curse and a punishment for their defiance of what they are meant to do, which is, obviously, kill.

  
  


Supporting points: In the anime, Eyes is the only Blade Child in the beginning who does not kill someone. Kousuke kills Sonobe, Rio kills Imazato. They show no signs of the pain. Eyes apparently has removed himself from the battlefield for a time(that is, we don't see him kill anyone), and he suffers at least twice from the intense pain. Kanone, who I assume has no real qualms about killing and probably has killed more than the other Blade Children, never shows any signs of the pain either.

  
  


Arguable points: Ryoko never seems to suffer from the pain, and she doesn't even take part in a murder until very late in the series, and then it's an accident. To work around this, you could assume that she just never allows anyone to see her suffering. If she's had it long enough, she could be good at hiding the pain, and we all know how determined/stubborn Ryoko can be.

  
  


The random killing urges:

The Blade Children are destined to bring death, it's safe to assume they are compelled to do it. I assumed also that they are not destined to love or be loved, just because it would go against the 'angels of death' image. So I went from there to decide that when a Blade Child dares to love or care about someone, the emotion is turned against them. The urge to kill is focused on whom they care about as some sort of sick punishment. Naturally, they fight this, but there's always the chance that it will catch them off guard. I also assume that they don't discuss this with each other for fear that the others do not experience it.

  
  
  
  


Eyes/Ryoko

This particular 'relationship' really caught my attention after awhile. Why does Ryoko hate Eyes instead of Kanone? It was Kanone, after all, who taught them how to kill, not Eyes.

My theory is this; Kanone was, technically, the leader of the Blade Children. But I think the others were more loyal to Eyes deep down. Kousuke and Eyes are certainly friends. At the point I wrote this story in, Eyes sort of follows Kanone's lead. I think Ryoko believes that if Eyes had made his own decisions and chosen not to kill, he could have convinced Kousuke and Rio to do the same. Eyes doesn't seem as set in the idea that they cannot change their destiny as Kanone is, so I do think that without Kanone's influence he might have chosen a different path. Instead, he went along with Kanone. Then Kousuke, following Eyes' lead, ended up a murderer. 

So, Ryoko hates Eyes and not Kanone because Kanone really believed what he was teaching, while Eyes could have chosen to support the 'no killing' way of life Ryoko chose.

  
  


Ages

I was pondering this earlier, how old are the Blade Children in this story? ....well, Eyes was 17 when the anime was set, and Kiyotaka had disappeared 2 years previously, so that means he would be at most 15 during this story(that's assuming Kiyotaka disappeared after he taught the Blade Children). I intended to be ambiguous about ages just because of content.

I assume that, during the anime, Kanone is 18, Ryoko and Kousuke are 17, and Rio...I'm not sure for her, she looks really young, but she goes to the same school as the rest of them...so, 16?

If you really must have a definite answer for this story I'll say Eyes, Kousuke and Ryoko are 15, Kanone is 16, and Rio is 14. Meh.

  
  


So those are my ramblings, my personal ideas and theories about the Blade Children. Thanks for reading Play For Me and hopefully I'll get some other Spiral fics out soon that you'll enjoy as well.


	4. Resolve

Been awhile since an update. But I've already worked on the next two chapters, so they should get done faster than this one.

****

It was a lazy weekend morning, most of the Blade Children had slept late and done almost nothing with their day so far, preferring instead to lounge about the house. Eyes Rutherford, of course, had been up at an hour that Kousuke would have called obscenely early and had spent his morning cleaning and tuning his piano(which was already immaculate). By the late afternoon, Kanone had convinced Eyes to come on a walk with him, as they often did.

Ryoko had taken the time to point out to Kousuke, who pretended not to listen, that if those two could spend some time together outside, he could go running with her sometimes. Kousuke had immediately sought out more agreeable company . . . like Rio. Kanone led the walk through vast woods that he knew by heart now, with Eyes not far behind him, moving with ethereal silence that came naturally. They didn't speak much, just enjoyed each others presence. Kanone lazily reached up and trailed his fingers against the leaves that were just starting to turn.

Eyes paused and gracefully jumped down a few rocks to the bank of a stream, inviting Kanone to sit with him for a while. It was wonderfully quiet, and each boy respected that for quite some time. Eyes laid back on the thin grass and looked into the clear skies that matched his eyes while Kanone preferred sitting and staring into the comfort of the gurgling stream. The afternoon passed slowly, until Kanone finally couldn't resist voicing the thoughts in his wandering mind.

A small smile appeared on Kanone's face. Looking into the distance, he murmured quietly,

"Do you think we will go to Hell, Eyes? "

Eyes immediately identified the language as Kanone's native German, and a mirror of Kanone's smile appeared on his pale lips. That was sort of a game they had played when they were younger; switching languages in their conversations. There was no real point to the game, they didn't try to trick the other into stumbling over unknown words or grammar, the game just ended when one of them slipped into a language the other didn't know.

Eyes answered easily in German,

"I do not believe in God or the Devil. So I put no stock in Hell or Heaven." with a slight pause to think the teen switched into French, an easy enough language, one he was more familiar with than German, "I never knew you were religious. Haven't The Blade Children always been Atheists?"

"I don't believe in a singular, all-powerful God or Devil, but there are certainly other things at work in this world. If not, how could beings such as us exist?" Kanone sighed and turned towards Eyes, leaning back against a tree. When he spoke again it was fluent Spanish.

"Hypothetically, for the sake of the argument; If there is indeed a Heaven and Hell, where do we fall?"

Once again Eyes pondered the question.

"If a God would suffer such as us to exist at all . . . I suppose we would go to Hell." He shrugged and looked down to the stream. Continuing the conversation and game, he continued in Arabic, "Most religions, after all, place murder of your fellow man as the highest of sins."

Kanone threw his head back and laughed, a sound both alluring and bone chilling at the same time. When he looked back to Eyes his smile was much the same as the laughter; affable yet deadly. Eyes felt a shiver run down his spine; it was far from unpleasant.

"'Your fellow man'?" He repeated. He jumped down and seated himself next to Eyes, enjoying the discussion and becoming more enthusiastic,

"Are we not something apart from human?" He leaned casually back, deciding to use Latin next, "We were created to bring death, perhaps not doing so would pave our path to Hell. If we have a destiny, a greater purpose, we should fulfill it. Right?"

"I know you believe that. I can see no other path, so I follow yours." 

"Hmf, we've had that discussion before," Kanone remembered well enough that day they had spent at the docks, "The Cursed Children have only one way through life. And when that is lost to us, we will fall, and there will be no one to catch us nor to carry us onward."

Kanone's eyes had narrowed as he spoke yet again of their destiny. Eyes briefly wondered, as he sometimes did, where Kanone had acquired such a strong belief. While the other Blade Children doubted their very existence, Kanone had created a purpose and path for it, and he lead them down that path like some zealous messiah, teaching them and protecting them.

Like a Guardian Angel.

". . . Maybe that end will be brought about by ourselves." Absentmindedly, Eyes slipped into Japanese, a language they had all been learning recently. They would have to move soon, this area was getting too dangerous. Dangerous to the point that they had pulled Ryoko and Rio out of school. Kanone had already mentioned the idea that they may even have to split up to ensure safety. But The hunters in Japan seemed sparse enough, they could go there together if they wished.

". . . I hadn't thought of that." a wicked grin appeared on his face as he thought of something else, "Who among us would betray the others?"

Eyes scoffed, faintly amused.

"That's wasn't. . . "  
". . .what you meant." Kanone licked his lips, "I know, Eyes. Consider that my unique sense of humor at work, won't you?"

They were quite close now, faces a few inches apart. Each of them paused, for a moment forgetting what they had been talking about. Eyes could see something in Kanone's eyes he couldn't quite identify, but he was sure it didn't have a place in a discussion about Heaven and Hell.

Kanone was almost startled to find them so close, he hadn't noticed when he had moved to sit so near Eyes, but now he was painfully aware. Aware of Eyes breath brushing his face, Eyes hair touching Kanone's skin lightly when the breeze blew correctly. So close...Suddenly Kanone cleared his throat and backed away. A dark shadow passed over his face, and he stopped speaking Japanese, adding quietly,

"I shouldn't have done that..."

Eyes furrowed his brow, taken aback. Kanone was speaking Swahili; a language Eyes was completely unfamiliar with. For a few minutes there, they had been having a great moment, just like old times. Eyes had been enjoying the conversation, and then Kanone had pulled away from him, even if only with a single sentence. Tersely, maybe a bit spitefully and tryingot forget the odd look in Kanone's eyes, he muttered in Hebrew(a language he knew Kanone had never bothered learning).

Kanone chuckled to himself, and switched back into English as they silently agreed the game was done. Besides, Eyes had an adorable accent when he spoke his first language.

"Whom do you think will die first, Eyes?"

Eyes turned slowly, the only thing betraying how startled he was by the question was a slight narrowing of his eyes.

"What?"

"Of us, our little group. Who will fall to The Hunters first?"

"What brought that up?" He knew already, but the subject was an unspoken taboo among them. They had to live day to day, and thinking to their unavoidable fate would make even that impossible.

"Well, it's unavoidable, isn't it? The five of us have been hunted since we were children, that we've all lived this long is a miracle. Think logically," he couldn't resist a chuckle, "You're good at that. There are countless Hunters after us, we'll all die eventually, there's no way around it. We can only dodge attacks and think our way through traps so many times before someone makes a mistake. So who do you think will slip up first?"

This had fascinated Kanone for some time. Death always fascinated him; the death of his parents, the first Hunter he had killed, the first time he had seen Eyes kill. . . but something about one of their own dying held the greatest allure for him, and he pondered it with a guilty, sick sort of pleasure. He hoped it was Ryoko.

He took one look at his friend, and he knew they didn't stand on common ground for this one. Eyes looked defensive, uncomfortable. Kanone figured he wasn't ready to face that particular fact, and he couldn't help but be a little disappointed. That small shred of innocence, if it could be called that, was oddly endearing though.

"Never mind." Kanone finally said, waving the whole conversation off dismissively. "It will happen when it happens. We...are not meant to live."

Eyes fidgeted slightly, his hands tightening minutely. There didn't seem to be anything he could say to that. Eyes, unlike Kanone, didn't have a set of beliefs he devoted himself to. He followed what his older friend said, and for the most part, it felt right. But something deep in the back of his mind questioned that last statement.

"Than why were we born?" A small voice whispered in that corner of Eyes mind. He did not voice the argument.

The uncomfortable moments of their earlier conversations forgotten(or perhaps just set aside, filed away in the brilliant minds of the boys to be pondered over later), the walk home was pleasant enough. The afternoon was warm, but with an occasional chill wind that still required a coat.

The pristine silence of the day was broken when they entered the house. That didn't surprise Eyes or Kanone, Kanone flashed a bemused grin at his friend and hung his coat up, hearing an argument from the living room.

The other three Blade Children sat on the floor around the coffee table, cards and coins scattered on the table. Not surprisingly, Kousuke was winning whatever it was they were playing. Even more predictably, Rio was accusing him of cheating, and Ryoko wasn't taking sides. Instead she sat leaning back against the couch looking a bit bored.

"Put in a bet or fold, Rio, those're the rules."

"Nu-uh, not when you're being a swindler!"

Kousuke rolled his eyes,

"I'm just lucky when it comes to cards."  
"Lucky my a. . . !"

"You wanna check my sleeves? My pockets? I got nothing hidden."

Kousuke set his hand down and exhibited empty sleeves, also pulling his pockets out. Rio was not convinced. She did, however, sit back down and pick up her cards. Glances suspiciously at the red-haired youth across from her, Rio 

"I'll see your bet, " She paused a moment, and turned to Ryoko,

"Could I borrow some money?"

Rio forfeited the coins Rio needed before folding. 

"Ryoko, you have to stay in sometimes to win."

She closed her eye and crossed her arms,

"I'm bored with this. We should go play soccer instead."

They bet a few more times before Kousuke finally thought to notice the two Blade Children who had just gotten home. When he turned to speak with them, Ryoko snuck a looked at his cards and promptly turned to Rio, whispering.

"Hey.. . you guys want to play? I could deal you in next round." Kousuke, blissfully unaware of the girls' treachery, asked the other boys.

Kanone declined politely and ambled out of the room aimlessly as Eyes took a seat with the others. Rio, after losing horribly, declared herself in alliance with Eyes, as if the game allowed for it, and spent the next round looking over his shoulder as well as at her own cards. Ryoko, despite her declaration of boredom, reentered the game and played with as much gusto as the rest of them, joking and fighting with everyone as the game continued.

Kanone opened the sliding door out to the back porch and leaned in the door way, letting the arguing still going on behind him lull into a comfortable background noise he could think in. He heard Eyes sit down to join the game, and wondered why he himself never felt any urge to spend long amounts of time with the whole group. Having pondered this plenty of times before, Kanone already had some kind of an answer, but he still had enough of a conscious to feel bad about it: He felt above his fellow Blade Children. He protected them, he taught them, and they needed him to survive. Maybe he was justified for feeling better than them sometimes.

That particular line of thought was lost as he heard Rio loudly gloating over Eyes' winning most of Kousuke's money, Eyes apparently didn't have much to say about this himself. With that, Kanone was back to thinking over another, even more infuriating problem he was having.

A bit angrily, Kanone snatched his throwing knives from the kitchen and went into the back yard again, almost slamming the door behind him and forgetting his coat. It was getting late, and the air was cold enough that Kanone felt goose bumps rising over his skin, but he ignored that as well. He stood opposite the target, at least twice as far away as his friends would consider to be their most difficult range, and hurled a knife without thinking, his mind whirling about Eyes. The knife sunk into the target and stayed, quivering. Kanone threw again, and again. That afternoon...he shook his head as he recalled the closeness of Eyes and the effect it had on him. He had almost kissed Eyes! What would have happened then? Surely he had more self-control than that, especially after he had decided to play it safe for awhile. Anger had replaced his confusion over love and he let it go for a time, venting with the projectiles.

Eyes heard the back door slide shut, and knew Kanone was outside throwing again. His attention on the game waned at the thought of Kanone. Everything about Kanone was uncertain now, things were changing for some reason. He recalled that afternoon and the odd moments they had shared on the river bank, the intensity of Kanone's gaze. Eyes realized that even when everything had felt like it used to, when they were talking and just being the friends they had always been it still felt wrong, like something was missing. Something he wanted to be there.

He still couldn't place it, this odd feeling that he was starting to have.

Glancing down at his hand as new cards were dealt, Eyes realized he had a hand that almost certainly meant another win. Pushing other thoughts away, he focused on the game and the company of his other friends.

Kanone had thrown and retrieved several times, and it was quite dark when his mind had cooled to the point of rational thought once more. What was he so scared of? He wondered, squinting in the darkness at teh target that now seemed even farther away. He was Kanone Hilbert, the most feared Blade Child of them all. Hunters feared him, the other blade Children practically worshiped him as their savior, one little crush shouldn't tear him up inside so much. Love shouldn't even affect such as him.

But it was. It hurt. Deep down, he was hurting himself by trying to deny this. It wouldn't do for much longer, he realized, throwing again. He could barely see the target, but he heard the metal bite into the wood. He held the next knife loosely, looking at his breath rising in clouds of cold air before his face. This was ridiculous.

He felt a new resolve developing, he would stop hiding this, that was cowardly. The twisting hurt in his soul had to stop, Eyes had to know how he felt. It was a risk Kanone felt was now necessary. Life was risk, love was risk, he didn't think he could settle for what they had now, not without finding out if they could have more. Rubbing his arms to bring them warmth, Kanone felt oddly content after he solidified his resolve to act. A thin smile was on his face, and he was about to go collect his knives and return to the house when he heard the door slide open.

"Kanone!" It was Rio, "What are you doing?"

She approached him, bundled up in a thick coat.

"It's freezing, come back inside."

He pulled his shirt tighter, the thin fabric did nothing to warm him, and ruffled Rio's thick hair.

"In a moment. Help me find my knives?"  
She chuckled and ran ahead of him to the tree, yelling over her shoulder,

"You make it sound like we have to look! They're all in the target, Kanone-kun!"

Kanone grinned impishly,

"Good, I'll meet you back inside then."

He bolted for the house, eagerly anticipating his warm room and comfortable bed. Rio, left out side to pull the thin blades from deep in the target, wondered what had gotten into him lately. Shrugging, she turned back to the target and tugged on the first knife.

****

Ok, if this seems like it's moving slowly, don't worry. The next chapter is where it really gets going.

I'll leave you to interpret that as you will.

This chapter was really fun because I got to think up random conversation type stuff; it was also annoying for the same reason because I'm no where near as philosophical sounding as those two are supposed to be. That and for some reason I keep writing Eyes and Kanone into real arguements, not the friednly sort of feel I wanted. It' hard because they evetnually end up with opposite views, but Eyes hasn't quite figured out what he believes right now, and I'm having trouble showing that.

That line about Ryoko dying first seems like it might be a bit too mean-spirited even for Kanone.....I figure when he starts thinking that kind of stuff over it's like a spiral(hah, I incorporated the title!): the more he thinks about it, the more immersed he gets in it.

I also feel bad 'cause it seems like I'm downplaying Rio's entire character. This whole story she's just been kind of a background character to instigate Kousuke. Can I be cheap and say it's because she's pretty young right now and hasn't created that cool way of carrying herself yet?

  
  



	5. Confession

There is a notable lack of the three other Blade Children, but yeah, this story focuses on Eyes and Kanone. And it seems to focus more on Kanone, who doesn't spend a whole lot of time with the others anyway. I'm hoping to write more about the other Blade Children in other stories.

* * *

Kanone lay in bed. It was late morning, and he was listening to the sounds in the house, trying to figure out where everyone was by just that. He could hear heavy footsteps on the basement stairs: Kousuke, obviously going to his room. A voice that was undoubtedly Ryoko's floated up from the general vicinity of the living room. The piano down the hall was playing, but it wasn't Eyes. The playing was too imprecise, too amateur. That would be Rio. She paused, and then it was Eyes playing the same tune, but the difference the change in skill brought was remarkable. So Eyes was giving Rio another lesson. Kanone smirked. Rio didn't show any exceptional skill with the piano, in truth she hardly ever practiced, and he had reason to believe the lessons she begged for were just an excuse to spend time with Eyes.

He'd been laying in his bed listening like this for a while. The fun part was when he lost track of someone and had to relocate them. Bemused, Kanone inwardly laughed at himself. This was an odd sort of hobby. Maybe he should take up an instrument instead, despite his apparent lack of musical talent. He didn't even really like music, aside from Eyes' playing of course. He was a bit partial to painting; although his paintings suffered the opposite vice Eyes' music did. While they certainly reached out to the viewer as gripping and often disturbing representations of emotion, they lacked refined techniques and design.

Eyes. Today was it, he remembered. Last night he had decided there would be no more stalling. Today he would find some time to talk to Eyes about them, he would finally put to rest all the warring emotion inside of himself. Who knew? Maybe Eyes would agree. It was certainly better to face a problem and be rid of it than let in linger and fester.

Catching his wandering mind, Kanone focused on the world around him again. He yawned and stretched slowly, deciding he should probably get up soon. Rubbing sleep out of his eyes, Kanone picked up his shirt from the floor and pulled it on.

"Hey, look whose finally awake!"

Ryoko almost never woke up before Kanone. So she took the chance to give him a hard time, if only briefly. Looking down at the newspaper comics on the kitchen table again, she off handedly continued,

"You missed breakfast, but I guess it's closer to lunch now anyway."

"I'm not hungry."

He could hear Rio practicing down the hall, she wasn't half bad. He wished Eyes would play. Kousuke's music drifted up through the floor; punkish, loud music from the radio. And Kanone applied the term 'music' to it very hesitantly. That was part of the reason Kousuke had his room in the basement in the first place. That and his tendency to stay up until ungodly hours of the morning while he listened to it.

"Is there any coffee?"

"Nope. An' you'll have to make it yourself if you'd like some."

"Thank you Ryoko." His voiced dripped with sarcasm. Ryoko smiled perkily,

"Anytime, Hilbert-kun."

He grunted in reply, then set up the coffee maker. As it began to make boiling noises while Kanone waited impatiently for caffeine, Ryoko spoke up again. She sounded far more serious now.

"Kanone . . . you said you saw a hunter near here a few days ago, right?"

"Yes, he escaped, unfortunately" Kanone felt the hunter's narrow escape was a black mark on his prowess as a Blade Child. Actually, it was more the fact that he hadn't had a weapon on him at the time that really bothered him. Maybe he was slipping.

"Have you seen anything else?"

Kanone leaned back against the counter,

"They're out there, and they're becoming more bold. That's why we're moving soon." He paused, then added somberly, "Watch yourself when you go running."

"When I was out this morning I thought I heard someone, and I know none of you guys were out. I kept going, and nothing else happened, but..."

"Trust your instinct on this" Kanone said firmly, "If you think someone saw you, be prepared for an attack." He poured what little coffee had already brewed into the cup and held it, waiting for it to cool a bit. "Tell the others, and don't go out too far on your own until we find this hunter."

Ryoko nodded, feeling a bit resentful on the inside. She didn't need to be ordered not to go out when there were hunters, Kanone was talking down to her again.

"And Ryoko . . . " she had a feeling she wouldn't appreciate whatever he was about to say, and something about his tone told her he knew she wouldn't either, "If you DO get attacked . . . it's your life or his. Understand?"

Ryoko looked up, narrowing her eyes at Kanone's too cheery smile. The smile that was sure to win you over unless you'd seen him murder someone while wearing it.

"I've never killed anyone before, Kanone, I won't start now."

Kanone, that odd smile taking on a hint of malice. She put up a brave face, but he knew the truth, and if she was going to act naive he wasn't scared to rudely bring her back into reality.

"You mean you've never _intentionally_ killed someone, don't you?" Her eyes widen the instant he brought that up, and Kanone, like a predator sensing fear, pursued, "You remember when I found you."

Kanone sipped his coffee, not looking at Ryoko as she froze, recalling things she had tried very hard to forget.

"That wasn't my fault."

"You know what we do to those close to us, whether we mean to or not. It was your fault, and you know it. Stop trying to deny what you are."

"I won't kill just because you want me too."

"At least have the sense to carry a knife; the rest of us do."

Ryoko's fingers tensed, wrinkling the paper in front of her,

"I refuse to..."

Kanone's expression seemed to say he doubted that, that her arrogance in the face of fate was nothing but amusing to him. In that moment, she almost hated him for it, but love and hate were often undistinguishable with them, maybe it was admiration she felt for Kanone's ruthless way of living, the total devotion he had to his ideals. Whatever it was, she wanted it to stop, and more than anything, she wanted him to stop smiling.

Kousuke walked into the kitchen during the following silence, listening to something on headphones. He waved absently to the other two on his way to the fridge where he picked up a can of juice, oblivious to the tension between them. Kanone sipped again at his coffee and watched Kousuke leave, humming to himself quietly. Ryoko watched Kanone, he sat for a few seconds looking calm and innocent, but than a devious grin appeared. Quick and silent he stole out of the room. Ryoko heard Kousuke yelp in surprise not long later, followed by indistinct, indignant voices. She just hoped he hadn't spilled juice on the carpet, and returned to the newspaper.

Kanone reappeared, retrieving his coffee. Ryoko didn't look up,

"Why do you insist on doing that to poor Kousuke?"

All malice from their previous conversation vanished somehow, Kanone replied off-handedly,

"He has to learn."

"He had headphones on, that's a bit harsh." Ryoko quipped as he headed for the back porch.

"It was a wonderful opportunity." Kanone called over his shoulder.

"Oh, and keep your stupid cat out of my room! You know I'm allergic!"

Well, at least now he knew where she'd been. And he'd succeeded in annoying Ryoko, which always appealed to his more childish, spiteful side. Maybe today would go well after all.

* * *

Uneventful, but well. One of those days that goes agonizingly slow because you intend to do something in the evening and it seems determined not to arrive. He watched was left of the morning standing on the back porch, watching the sunlight slowly move across the field and over the trees. When the sun reached its peak, and the shadows no longer shifted but nearly disappeared, Kanone sought the comforting solitude of his room once more, stopping to retrieve a white furred cat from her spot on Ryoko's bed.

Hoisting the cat, Kanone brushed some of the excess fur off Ryoko's sheets, kind of feeling bad for her. Holding the animal close Kanone flopped back onto his own bed. Indignant, the cat squirmed away to sit at the edge of the bed, smoothing her fur with a few swipes of her tongue. Kanone admired, as always, the quiet dignity with which the animal held herself, and felt pride in the connection he had worked, was still working, to establish. As if proving the point to himself, Kanone scooted closer and ran his hand over her head and down her back, a gesture the cat would violently refuse any of the other Blade Children.

Scratching her ears, Kanone allowed himself a genuinely happy smile,

"You're a good friend, Sirena."

Sirena purred deafeningly loud and curled up against him. Any cat owner is familiar with the immense guilt that accompanies waking a sleeping cat, and Kanone was no exception. So, letting the blissful purring drown out any outside sound, he lay down and relaxed.

* * *

At some point he must have fallen back asleep, for when he woke Sirena was gone and it was quite a bit darker outside his window. Feeling groggy, Kanone sat up and yawned.

As he walked down the stairs, he could hear the TV on and the channels being rapidly cycled through. Eyes sat alone in the living room, looking remarkably dignified and serious for someone who was flipping through channels. But that was just so him.

Kanone came up behind the couch, leaning forward onto it,

"Where's everyone else?"

Eyes named them off absently,

"Rio just went back to the piano, I believe Kousuke went to bed already and Ryoko should be in the study reading. She's been moping all day." He cast a sidelong look at Kanone as he sat, "That wouldn't have anything to do with you, would it?"

Kanone chuckled innocently

"Whatever makes you say that?"

Eyes smiled, a very faint, amused smile that most would have missed and Kanone coveted. The TV continued flickering as Eyes cycled through channels, but Kanone doubted he was really paying it much attention. He leaned back, throwing his head over the back of the couch a heaving a sigh,

"Slow day?"

Eyes questioned, mutely, Kanone nodded. Eyes paused, looking at Kanone. Something was wrong, he could tell by the set of Kanone's shoulders, the tenseness around his eyes. It was not in his nature to pry, or to even care about, other people's business, but as he watched his best friend obviously struggling inwardly about something, he felt both sympathy and a flare of anger.

Why wouldn't Kanone just talk to him? The next second, the tv went blank. Eyes set the control aside and shifted his weight to face Kanone. Kanone cracked one eye open as he heard the electricity sizzle down.

"Kanone, something's bothering you."

It was a statement, not a question. And now Eyes was watching him expectantly, figuring, knowing that the other Blade Child couldn't back down from a confrontation of any kind. Kanone chewed his lip, thinking. Usually he could plan a conversation sentence by sentence, able to anticipate the other persons' reactions at least to some extent if not word for word. While it was a great advantage normally, now it proved a crutch, for finding that he honestly had no clue where this could go had Kanone more than a little scared, and he wasn't used to the cold feeling in the pit of his stomach that accompanied fear.

This would be touch and go, a situation that felt just as dangerous as the many times he had fought for his life. The seconds dragged on, and Kanone tried to think of a sentence that was both vague and definite enough to begin. Eyes waited in silence, content with the victory of finally having begun this much needed talk.

Finally, Kanone cleared his throat, and steapled his fingers, leaning forward.

"I...hmm. What would you do, Eyes, if you...cared so much about someone, that it hurt to even think that they didn't..." He cut himself off, feeling like an complete idiot. That had been far too blunt.

Next to him, Eyes actually smiled, hinting at the immense relief that had just flooded through him. He had been so worried about Kanone for weeks, and now the problem turned out to be something so simple? But nothing was ever as simple as it seemed, especially anything concerning Blade Children, and it struck Eyes as somewhat odd that Kanone was still refusing to look him in the eye. He pushed that nagging concern to the side for now,

"You're in love?" He almost felt like laughing, the past few weeks he had been terrified of losing his friendship, and the only problem wasn't even a problem. And yet...

"Do I know her?"

Kanone looked up slowly, giving him and odd look before answering thoughtfully,

"I believe so..."

Deception in all alleys of life it seemed, came the most naturally to them. While it was very unlike Kanone to dance around a subject like he was now doing, he couldn't help but be encouraged by the thought of getting some kind of answer out of Eyes without a direct confrontation.

Eyes' voice did not betray the undercurrent of worry that still lingered. He knew better than to dismiss his instincts, and they were telling him something wasn't right. Even so, he pressed,

"That's the only thing that's been bothering you?"

Kanone laughed, partially at himself, partially at the situation in general, if anything, it seemed to assure Eyes that things were going better than they were. It was just how Eyes had summed it up, the way he made everything sound so simple, that really got Kanone. And once he started laughing, he found it only got funnier. He laughed until his gut hurt and he was on the verge of tears before he finally got himself under control. Wiping at his eyes, he flopped back, feeling better despite himself. Eyes leaned back as well, bemused by his behavior.

"Well?"

Kanone was still steadying himself, and he raised an eyebrow quizzically in reply. Eyes pulled his legs up onto the couch, sitting on them so he could turn to face Kanone.

"What's wrong then?"

Kanone shrugged, once again trying to dodge around the things he wanted so desperately to say,

"You'll think I'm being stupid."

Eyes grinned, feeling incredible suddenly, like all his worries had been unfounded. It seemed like in a brief moment their friendship had been restored to its former state, and Kanone was again wanting to confide in only him. He quickly reassured him,

"Of course not."

Kanone took another deep breathe, but this was not from a result of the laughter. Now he felt very little like laughing, now they were getting very close to the heart of the matter.

"I haven't been able to confess. I'm scared."

He didn't realize he was going to say that last phrase until he heard it slipping past his traitorous lips. Eyes took that in with an imperceptible shrug,

"That's natural, isn't it?"

"_There's nothing natural about us"_

"...perhaps."

"Well...are you just scared she doesn't like you? Or is there something else?"

Eyes wondered if this mystery girl was a Blade Child. If not, that could be the real problem. The more he thought about it, the more that odd, unsettling feeling came back. Kanone bordered on hating Ryoko, and Rio was out of the question, so who could that leave? He couldn't remember any friends Kanone had outside their group that he had been more than barely attached to. A love seemed almost impossible, logically thinking.

Kanone, ignorant of Eyes rambling thoughts, continued.

"It's a little more complicated. I don't know if it's worth risking what we already have."  
  
He said seriously, eyes catching Rutherford's. Eyes was momentarily startled by the intense stare, he almost missed what Kanone was saying, an alarm going off somewhere in the back of his mind.

"Our friendship is perfect the way it is, Eyes, I'd rather keep it that way than lose it on an emotion I may be misinterpreting."

Eyes got the distinct impression that Kanone was not telling him the whole truth. Despite that, he concentrated on helping Kanone as best he could. After all, they were friends, right?

"You would still be miserable though, if you leave it as it is now. Would you rather risk losing a friendship with the potential to gain something more, or leave it and always wonder what she would have said?"

"And what do you think I should do?"

Eyes' answer was well thought out, perfectly logical, and therefore unacceptable in the chaotic battlefield that was the human heart.

"Tell her."

Kanone shook his head slowly,

"No, I don't think that would do it."

Eyes was taken aback. He'd never known Kanone to hesitate, and was slower in coming up with another suggestion.

"Maybe...a random display of affection? Get her something. Or do something that won't leave any doubt as to how you feel."

Kanone moved a bit closer, asking intensely,

"Do you really think...?"

Eyes paused before confirming, that feeling returning in full force. Something else was definitely going on here, and it was bothering him that he couldn't put his finger on it. Giving no hint to this thought, he answered,

"I think it would work perfectly."

Kanone steeled himself for only a moment, any more and he would have lost his nerve, than he pushed forward suddenly, pressing his lips to Eyes'.

* * *

Mwuhahah! When do I update next? Who knows? ahem Sorry. I've been dying to get up to this point for awhile. We aren't that close to the end though, more like half-way-ish.

Ya know what's beginning to bother me? Whenever I have to talk about their eyes, I have to switch to calling Eyes Rutherford, and it gets old really fast.


	6. Together We Are Alone

Hopefully this wasn't too long a wait.

I finished this at 2 in the morning, so there's a slight chance that I pull this and fix some things if I reread it and go 'wtf?'

* * *

Eyes mind had always worked on several levels. He could think about multiple ideas at once, like having six conversations going on at one time and being able to comprehend and contribute to all of them. At the moment, however, they were all in a uniform, stunned silence. That had never happened before, and he froze.

The most logical argument surfaced first, frantically trying to make sense of the situation. A kiss. A kiss alluded to love or lust. Love was a human creation meant to give meaning to the simple biological instinct to breed and pass on one's genetic material. Therefore, love should only exist between a male and female, as two males or two females could produce no young and therefore love(i.e., procreation) was not possible between them. Logically speaking of course. That line of reasoning really didn't help him at the moment, yet it continued to repeat itself over and over. It was then another voice spoke up breaking through all the rest. This was a part of himself Eyes was very disconnected with and surprised to be hearing from. And it was telling him to shut up and enjoy his first kiss.

Which, indeed, it was. And it was such a simple thing in theory, a kiss. Just flesh against flesh, the same idea as a handshake or a hug or any idle contact. Yet this felt different from any other touch, and Eyes recalled their conversation from before, realizing he had been right. This did perfectly express how Kanone felt, and, once again that long silent voice startled Eyes when it pointed out this was far from unpleasant.

For Kanone, the experience was breathtaking. The instant their lips touched it was like an immense burden had been lifted from him, and indeed he had just destroyed all the deception he had so carefully been keeping. With the relief came a completely conflicting sensation as adrenalin coursed through him. He could hear his heart pounding in his ears, fathomed Eyes could hear it as well, and was scared to open his eyes for fear of what he might see on Eyes' face.

The kiss lasted longer then Kanone could have hoped, and, though simple and hesitant, was sweeter than any other Kanone had shared with lovers' he'd had before. He was scared, reluctant to pull away, and Eyes . . . well, he might have been too startled, but Kanone dared hope it was something else that stopped him from pushing him away. When the kiss was finally broken, Kanone barely pulled away. Their faces were so close that their lips still faintly brushed together, and Kanone could feel Eyes' breath on him. It was maddening. He waited, dreading and expecting Eyes to back away, to push him away, or voice some disapproval.

Through all the confusion, Eyes was feeling the same surge of excitement, though at the same time was very shaken. He was actually disappointed that Kanone had stopped, and he felt something very new awakening within himself. He wanted something, that one voice in the back of his mind was no longer content there, and it clamored for something more. The trouble was, even if Eyes managed to get over the fear, if he could quiet the other impulses and thought processes that had so far governed his life and cried out against this, this exhilarating moment, these new sensations . . . he didn't even know exactly what it was he was suddenly yearning for. And he was scared, inexplicably, and undeniably frightened of what he did not quite understand.

* * *

"Rutherford!"

There was no answer.

"Where is he?"

Ryoko had been having a normal day, a horridly normal, uneventful day. One of those days that you feel you've had a million times before and all you want is _something_ to change the routine. Ryoko had been feeling that all day as she moped around the house.

So she had seen no problem helping Rio out, she knew, as she opened the door to the living room.

"Rutherfor..."

Now, Ryoko didn't consciously have a list of things she rather not bear witness to, but she was suddenly very sure that seeing Kanone on top of Eyes, their lips a hairsbreadth away from each other, was very high, if not topping, that list. She froze instantly, as did the two teens on the couch, and for several seconds they all sat as if carved from stone.

Eyes moved first. His face going bright red for perhaps the first time in his life, he shoved Kanone away and stood quickly. Refusing to face either of the other Blade Children, he instead busied himself with straightening his shirt. Equally embarrassed, Ryoko also made every effort to not make eye contact with anyone in the room. Remembering why she was here in the first place, she tried to act like nothing was out of the ordinary,

"Rutherford-san, Rio wanted...um...some help...packing."

Eyes cleared his throat, desperately trying to compose himself. Running his fingers back through his hair, he hurried to leave. When he spoke he was relieved to hear his voice sounding as mellow and controlled as always,

"I'd be glad to."

When he left, Ryoko hadn't managed to move, and she suddenly regretted it now that she was alone with Kanone. He was still sitting on the couch where he had been pushed, and didn't appear to realize she was still there. His hand rested lightly upon the spot where Eyes had pushed, his face crestfallen and almost blank. He felt hurt, betrayed, by the reaction. Of course, he couldn't blame Eyes for being embarrassed, or a bit frightened even, but he had shoved him away.

In a daze, Kanone finally stood, now clutching at the fabric of his shirt without realizing he was doing so. Ryoko still watched, wondering if she should leave him be, or if now was the time to offer some kind of encouragement, comfort even. She wasn't sure what Kanone would be willing to accept from her at the moment, all things considered.

Kanone tried to sort through what had just happened and what it all meant. Had Eyes been too surprised to react before Ryoko had entered the room? Perhaps, as he had so feared, he had just overstepped his bounds with Eyes. He recalled the embarrassed, maybe even horrified look in Eyes face, and bit his lip, his face contorting as if he could expel the memory through sheer will. It refused to go away, and, as with all bad memories, only hurt more the longer it lingered in his mind's eye.

He looked up, focusing on Ryoko for a moment. Irrational anger, born of his own embarrassment and frustration hit him, and Ryoko was the only target. Whatever she saw on his face in that moment scared her, for she backed up a step without realizing she had. Looks couldn't kill, but Kanone certainly could. But he said nothing, as did she. A strange calm descended over his features, more chilling than the outright rage she had seen before, and still without speaking Kanone left the room.

Alone, Ryoko let out a breath she hadn't realized she was holding. Well, that was about the most unexpected thing ever. It seemed even stranger, considering the amount of friendly jabs Kousuke had made concerning his opinion of Eyes' sexual orientation. Shaking her head, Ryoko let out a long breath, and resolved to stay as far out of whatever was going on as possible.

* * *

Rio looked up happily as Eyes entered the room, blissfully unaware of what had just happened. Her normally immaculate room was showing heavy signs of the early stages of packing; everything was scattered about, every flat surface supporting piles of yet to be sorted items and clothing.

"There's so much stuff in here I thought I could use some help getting it sorted. You don't mind, right? I told Ryoko not to bother if you were busy."

"No, it's perfectly all right."

Was it? There was something he was feeling, but Eyes wasn't sure if it was relief for this reprieve or irritation. Certainly Kousuke or Ryoko would have been just as willing to help Rio, but then...had he wanted to stay with Kanone? Was he ready to deal with all this, or even accept it?

Rio had knelt in front of pile on the floor, and now held a few books in her hands. Mechanically, barely registering the movement, Eyes had joined her, pulling an empty box to them. Rio dropped the books she held into the box, leaving Eyes to arrange them nicely, and sifted through the pile. With an amused and somewhat amazed laugh, Rio beheld a battered, tiny book.

"Can you believe I still have this? Ryoko gave this to me on my, what?...sixth birthday?"

He actually could remember Rio receiving the paperback, remembered how happy the gift had made her. Watching the young girl set the book aside in the trash pile was, for some reason, very sad in Eyes' mind. Happiness was so fleeting. Should one enjoy something knowing the risk that one day it may fade, or was it better to bypass that possibility by distancing ones self?

Thoughtfully, he brought his fingertips to his lips, droning out his current surroundings.

"Eyes-kun? Eyes?"

"....?"

Rio's face came into focus, jolting him back to reality. She cocked an eyebrow, pursing her lips as she regarded him,

"Are you feeling well?" Perhaps as a joke, or perhaps to emphasize her concern, Rio pressed her hand to his forehead, finding it cool as always, "It's not like you to be _quite_ so detached."

"Oh, it's nothing. There's...a lot on my mind right now."

Leaning back on her legs, Rio spread her hands, continuing with a gusto unique to her. It was very endearing, and Eyes smiled despite himself,

"Tell me about it, I mean, this is the biggest move we've ever done, and the first with all of us, right? Can you imagine this plane ride? Ugh." She laughed to herself more than anyone else. Setting her hand on her lap, one on top of the other, her face fell, and when she spoke again the enthusiasm was gone from her voice, and in its place was a softer, colder sound.

"Do you think we might have to split up when we get to Japan?"

Her worries had suddenly spilled out, and Eyes was grateful to put his aside and face hers.

"There would be benefits to staying in smaller groups, but I believe we work best as we are. Splitting up too much could make us just as vulnerable as having too many Blade children in one place."

"I know, but Kanone was saying we might have to...."

Kanone. Why did she have to mention that name right now? Eyes closed his eyes, the set of his shoulders betraying the sudden discomfort that had set in. He continued to speak as if nothing was out of the norm,

"I doubt we will."

Rio looked up at him, her grey eyes hiding none of the worry that the thought of separation gave her. Rio, among them, had been orphaned the youngest, and alone the longest before finding the others. The very chance that she might have to leave the comfort of her friends was one of the only things that truly scared the young Blade Child.

"Eyes...if...if we do get separated...."

She intertwined her hands, pausing like she couldn't quite find the words to continue. Eyes prompted her,

"Yes?"

She blurted suddenly, getting it all out at once.

"Will you promise not to leave me alone?"

She didn't know what she had expected him to answer, but was grateful when she felt his hand rest on her shoulder and heard the quiet, smooth voice that she so loved hearing say,

"Of course."

But it wasn't as comforting as she had hoped it would be to hear. The hand on her shoulder didn't feel like she wanted it to. For when Eyes spoke to her, it was with a kind of love, yes. But the hand on her shoulder was the hand of a friend, as was the comfort. A friend, and nothing more.

Eyes managed to keep himself busy helping Rio, he let the manual work distract him from his rampaging thoughts, and did not relish the idea of trying to get to sleep tonight, or facing Kanone in the morning.

* * *

Kousuke didn't hear the door open or realize someone had entered his room until Ryoko pulled the pillow from underneath his head and flopped with it the thick carpeting, making herself completely at home. A bit miffed, Kousuke turned down his music and silently lamented the loss of his pillow. Ryoko smirked up at him, but the smirk seemed distracted.

"Something wrong?"

Ryoko kept her face clean of any worrisome emotions and grinned broadly,

"No, just wanted some company."

Ok, he could deal with that. If there was anything serious she would tell him. So Kousuke let the matter drop, moving onto more important things, such as the retrieval of property.

"...you stole my pillow."

"Yup."

"...and I'm not getting it back?"

"Nope."

He chuckled,

"So...are you planning on sleeping down there then? 'Cause I wholeheartedly approve."

Ryoko managed to shrug even though she was flat on her back,

"If I don't feel like getting up, which I don't."

Kousuke lay on his stomach, his crossed arms hanging over the edge of the bed so he could look down at Ryoko. He groped the bed stand blindly for a moment before finding his glasses, and replaced them on his nose, hating his handicap as it was again shown to him. Ryoko was so much better looking when in focus, he wished he didn't need glasses to see her.

"So, any word on where exactly we're moving?"

"Not really, Kanone doesn't like giving out specifics does he? I was going to talk to him tomorrow about it though."

Now she wasn't sure she could talk to Kanone or Eyes and think about anything other than what she had seen tonight. Part of her desperately wanted to tell Kousuke, but she knew better. Eyes and Kanone wouldn't want her telling people.

"That's so annoying. I mean, 'Japan' is not an acceptable answer!"

She could tell Kousuke wasn't really mad, just being exasperated for the sake of being so. It was refreshing, talking to him, it always was. Everyone else tried so hard to be serious and in control. It was nice to be around someone who acted more like a normal human being sometimes. Ryoko folded her hands behind her head, lounging on the carpet and humming along with the chorus of the song playing.

* * *

Eyes couldn't sleep.

He'd known this was going to happen. How could he sleep with his mind still going a mile a minute and confusing him more and more as it did so?

Eyes finally admitted to himself that he wasn't getting any sleep this night and left his bed. Going to the window, he lifted the glass and stuck his head outside. It was pleasantly cool and clear, just what he needed right now. Maybe his brain would take a hint from the night air.

With surprising agility, he climbed out the open window and onto the small section of roof below it. Hooking his hands above the window now, he swung his leg up onto the highest part of the roof where he lay on the shingles. They were uncomfortably scratchy against his almost bare back, but he barely noticed tonight. Usually he would bring a blanket up if he intended to stay for a while, but he hadn't remembered, and now he didn't feel like getting back up.

Usually he could find some solace when he came to the roof, but tonight it wasn't helping much, and after several hours of waiting for an epiphany, something that would tell him what he needed to do, what he needed to say or realize that would make everything make sense again, Eyes conceded that it wouldn't come. Feeling no great urge to return to the interior of the house, Eyes instead welcomed sleep in the early hours of morning where he lay on the slanting rooftop.

* * *

Yeah, Eyes is just a _little_ repressed . . . you figure this is sixteen years of having had no one he loved in his life except Kanone suddenly being mixed with hormones(not even the Blade Children are above such things . . . )Eyes is definitely freaking out.

I figure Kanone is very ahem 'experienced' where Eyes is clueless. As for where he went for the last half of the chapter, probably taking a cold shower.

Gasp! Other Blade Children interactions! Actually, there's more of them as the story goes, I've realized, Kousuke is pretty active the next few chapters, and of course Ryoko is in on this because of what happened in this chapter. Poor Ryoko . . . no, wait, she got to see Eyes and Kanone kiss . . . I'm jealous.

And at some point in this story Kanone will be nice to Ryoko, because they had to have at least a pretense of companionship for them to act the way they did to each other in the anime.


End file.
